OK, well now at least TWO people I know will be reading this story, Bradley Jacobson, a friend of mine in West Hollywood, CA and his friend Amy LOL. My reason for calling them to this story is simple, The band “Shitting Glitter” has been mentioned to me on more than one occasion by Brad as he indulges me with stories about his friends Amy Crosby & Devin Tait (sorry Brandon, you rarely get a mention [just kidding] lol).
Well after all those plugs for the group, I’ll finally get to the point of my story, Not Shitting Glitter, but rather Pooping Gold!
That’s right for the man (or woman) who has everything or at least thought they did, There is now something to go just that one step further, a Pill to ensure every stool is golden!
One of the biggest dreams of certain gay men and straight women everywhere has finally come true. Nope it’s not a cure for cancer or AIDS or Alzheimers, it’s a tiny little breakthrough that allows a person to literally shit gold glitter.
After swallowing one of the pills (which are now on sale, for real, for $425 a pop), the consumer’s stools will soon resemble King Tut’s tomb for an unmentioned amount of time.
A few questions arise with this breakthrough in technology, of course:
Is the ideal consumer for this product hoping to show off the results of their purchase to others? Or merely bask in the radiance of their extravagance in private? Will the gold glitter pills usher in a new era of panning for gold, this time around based in the sewer systems?
Want to shit gold? I mean, LITERALLY? Just swallow one of these Gold Pills and all your glittery doo-doo dreams will come true. This product is totally for real-real and not just for play-play. The pill capsule will set you back $425, is filled with 24-karat gold leaf and dipped in gold. It’s brought to us by Tobias Wong and Ju$tAnother Rich Kid. Their inspiration is the man who has absolutely everything. Yes, the man who has everything… except for glittery shit. The rest of us? Well, the rest of us are trying to make ends meet and hoping to poop as discreetly as possible.
Analogous to our culture’s obsession with luxury and consumption, these 24K gold leaf capsules turn your innermost parts into chambers of wealth. Consume and digest.
So here’s the facts:
In 2007 the Museum of modern Art in San Francisco accessions committee purchased several items from the Indulgence range from Citizen. In 2008 these objects were on shown during 246 and Counting, a two-year timeline of pivotal objects in design that have not only shaped the world we live in but also the lens through which we experience it, curated by Henry Urbach, formally the owner of the NY based eponymous Architecture Gallery.
Gold Pills are part of the INDULGENCE range designed through the collaboration of Tobias Wong and Ju$t another Rich kid (Ken Courtney) in 2005, who suggested “Like an addict, all I want is more. Like celebrity and celebrity culture, demand for luxury items is completely created.” As an extension of our obsession with fame, celebrity, and commodities, they designed a line of luxury objects: INDULGENCES (for the man who has absolutely everything). INDULGENCES addressed the creation of and demand for the unnecessary, directly commenting on the ever-expanding market of luxury items in our culture, seven INDULGENCES were created.
The objects chosen were the concrete doorstop cast from an Alvar Aalto Savoy vase which is unceremoniously smashed to release the form, entitled Doorstop designed by Tobias Wong. CITIZEN:Citizen produced 10 as a limited edition. Cokespoon #1 a solid bronze cast of the ubiquitous Bic pen cap which is then copper and gold plated designed by Tobias Wong and Just Another Rich Kid. Cokespoon #2 a solid bronze cast of the 1980’s McDonalds coffee stirer which is then copper and then gold plated designed by Tobias Wong and Just Another Rich Kid. The rich history of this piece can be read about here. The fourth and last piece being Swizzlestick also designed by Tobias Wong and Just Another Rich Kid which comes from a solid bronze casting of a Playboy drinks stirrer which is coper and then gold plated.
Sadly Bitches, for those of you with your Amex at the ready… These are now out of stock with no foreseeable date of next delivery, Well I suppose we can be grateful at least that no one is selling these as a ‘used’ item on EBay!
Stay Young, Stay Hung Bitches… OMGBitches.com